Healthy Hearts, Healthy Relationships
During this event, Wellness staff passed out stress hearts and healthy relationships brochures on a day in February.
You are worth it...
Don't believe us? We've included a couple of real relationship "survival stories" to encourage you that a healthy relationship is available to everyone. You just have to make the right choices.
Are you in a Healthy Relationship?
Can you say what you like or admire about your partner?
Is your partner glad that you have other friends?
Is your partner happy about your accomplishments and ambitions?
Does your partner ask for and respect your opinions?
Does your partner really listen to you?
Can your partner talk about his or her feelings?
Does your partner have a good relationship with his or her family?
Does your partner have good friends?
Does your partner have interests besides you?
Does your partner take responsibility for his or her actions and not blame other for his or her failures?
Does your partner respect your right to make decisions that affect your own life?
Are you and your partner friends? Best friends?
It's always important to evaluate our relationships...whether they are a dating relationship or simple a friendship with someone of the opposite sex.
Healthy Relationships:
- Have mutual TRUST.
- Have mutual RESPECT.
- Are FUN!
- Are SELFLESS.
- Bring out the BEST in you.
- Are worth WAITING for.
If you need to talk about an abusive or unhealthy relationship:
Call the Baylor Counseling Center: 254-710-2467
Open Monday through Friday
8:00AM to 12:00PM and 1:00PM to 5:00PM
OR
Talk to your Community Leader or Resident Chaplain...they are here to help you!
OR
Spiritual Life
254-710-3517
Story One
I stumbled out an abusive, manipulative, and detrimental relationship with my last boyfriend in college. After a few counseling sessions, countless late night heart to hearts with my new precious roommates, pep talks from my mom, working through the book, "Breaking Free," deep breaths, diligent prayer, and falling asleep on my Bible, my heart slowly began to heal.
I chose to believe the truths about me rather than the lies I'd believed for years. I chose to believe I was worth it; I was beautiful; I was whole; I was unique. I also realized I was not the only one hurting and many were in much more pain than I. This was a daily, sometimes hourly choice. My heart was healing, but not yet whole. It was guarded - with ten-foot walls and cannons ready to fire at the next sight of danger.
Then he came along. He climbed the walls of my heart and dared to get close. His laughing eyes and crooked smile made me melt. I did not let him know this, of course. He pursued me the way I believe Christ pursues his church...relentlessly. He rescued my heart from cynicism and bitterness, showing me that a man could be trusted.
Three and a half years later, we are loving marriage more than ever. We have the utmost respect for each other and ask God daily for a selfless heart. We work at our relationship. It's a priority for us - a way we can show the world Christ's love. We live gratefully, realizing each day is a gift from our Father, the Redeemer of our hearts. Our wedding invitation said, "Choosing to live the adventure...together." This is exactly what we've done. I never knew a relationship (with anyone) could be this healthy. It is possible!
Story 2
I chose to believe. My then boyfriend, soon to be fiance, had left me weeping in my bedroom after he said that we should just be friends. We had been talking engagement and then...nothing. I remember that night, lying face down on my floor sobbing. After a few minutes, something rose up in me...a boldness to believe. In that moment, I prayed, "God, I choose to believe. I choose to believe that I will be ok, that one day I will not be alone." In that moment, I also chose to face the pain, not run from it. It was difficult; finding myself in a room or my car, sobbing for hours because of the pain and the loneliness in my heart. But I still chose to believe. In these moments, I found myself a broken woman, needing my heart to be shaped, healed, and set free.
A few years later, I had a bump in the road to full recovery. After my disappointing breakup, I found that I had built up thick walls, afraid of being disappointed. This "hump in the road" told me everything a woman wants to hear: You're beautiful, I'll never leave you, you are perfect... but then he didn't return my calls or email. After being disappointed in myself. I chose, then in that moment, that I was worth believing in myself again - that I could be someone's soul mate.
One year later, I am the soul mate to someone who is absolutely perfect to me. I never imagined being where I am now without the journey that brought me here. I absolutely love my life.
Healthy Relationships are possible... but you have to LOVE YOURSELF first, something that is difficult for many of us. Until you know who you are, YOU can't truly know someone else or be able to maintain your identity in the relationship.